Arshad Warsi
Arshad Warsi, 44, lost both his parents at the age of 18 and has literally brought himself up. On a break from shooting for Dedh Ishqiya for promoting his upcoming film Jolly LLB, he talks to TOI about his unusual childhood, why Maria is special and what only Jaya Bachchan knows about him. Excerpts:
Let's talk about your childhood.
I was born and brought up in Mumbai. My father's original name was Ahmed Ali Khan till he became a follower of a holy man Waris Pak and we became Warsis. My father was a fun guy and a good poet and singer, had friends in the film industry and was so generous that he would give away expensive gifts like his car and watches to his friends. We owned two buildings on Grant Road but lost them due to the law and the tenants got to own the flats they lived in. He also owned a bungalow in Juhu, which again we lost. At the age of eight, I went to a boarding school in Devlali and would come home only during holidays. I have never interacted much with my parents. I would come twice a year, and would just have a good time and go back. My memory about my school and friends is more than my memory of my parents. When I was nine, I was selected from amongst thousands of students by two British men to get trained as a world-class gymnast. I asked my father for permission but he denied. While it was his great foresight to not allow me to take it up, at that time I just felt angry as I wanted it so badly. I became indifferent to my parents as I stayed away from them. When you send a kid to a boarding school, you must stay in touch with your child, you must write letters and they should never feel abandoned. They should feel that they have been sent to a boarding not to get rid of them but to make them better and this needs to be communicated. My parents would sometimes forget my holidays. So I would not be allowed to go home during holidays as my parents had forgotten to send a letter to my school seeking permission for me to go. As a result I would spend a part of my holidays in school. I would write letters to myself and would ask the day scholars to go to town and post it back to me. My house-masters knew that I was writing my own letters and became close to me.
Are you attached to your parents?
My father died of bone cancer when I was 18 and within two years of his death, my mother died of kidney failure. I brought myself up. I have been independent and learned to live on my own. I can't understand when I hear boys and girls talking about how they can't live without their parents. When I see a mother-son emotional scene, I cannot relate to that at all.
How did you get your first film?
While we were not deprived of money, after my parents fell ill, I could see my life crumbling. We had a house, but maintaining it became a problem, so we had to let go of it. From a bungalow, we shifted into a one room flat and I understood that life was changing. I quit school after the 10th and started working. I did everything, from being a cosmetics salesman to working in a photo lab to assisting Bhatt sahab on Kaash and Thikana to joining Akbar Sami's dance group. I realised that I loved dancing and became a choreographer. I would choreograph musicals for Alyque Padamsee and Bharat Dabholkar. Whatever I earned would go into dialysis and treatment of my mother. After my parents, my brother and I shifted into a small flat, where, if I stretched my hands, I could touch the wall on both sides. I had mentally programmed myself that it was a phase that would pass and was just managing my life. Till one day when Joy Augustine came home and offered me a film after seeing my ability to entertain people around me. By that time, I had started doing reasonably well as a choreographer and did not want to leave it for acting, as I feared failure. I then got a call from Jayaji. I almost died receiving a call from her and went to meet her. I don't know how Jayaji knew that I have talent but she gave me my first role in ABCL's Tere Mere Sapne. I took to acting like fish to water.
Munna Bhai MBBS changed your life. How did it happen?
My first director Joy Augustine and Raju Hirani were friends. Raju would come watch the editing and loved me as an actor. Nine years later, he made his first film and cast me in the role Circuit.
How did Maria and you fall in love?
Maria was participating in the Malhar festival where I was the judge. I found her to be a good dancer and offered her to join my dance group. She became my lead dancer and started assisting me. At some point, she fell for me. My friends made me aware that she had fallen for me, but Maria would never accept it. So once, when we had gone for a play to Dubai, I could feel her attraction towards me through the journey and was feeling bugged, as she was not accepting it. So, I gave her half a glass of beer and she blurted out that she loved me. We started dating and got married.
You had a rough patch in your marriage a few years ago. Any lessons for the future?
For about nine months in that year, I just forgot that I have a family and was out of the house that was not good. It was a stupid phase in my life of overdoing something. I have always believed in having a perfect family, but I got swayed at that time about producing a film and got over-involved in it. I will never do it again.
Who is your emotional anchor?
No one, but I have a support system in Maria. She is solid. After my first film, I had a lot of work for five years and then suddenly, for three years I had no work. Maria used to work as a VJ and earn while I used to manage the home. Her morals are so intact and it always amazes me that a person can be that correct. I love the way she looks after her parents and her family. I cannot find another woman like Maria.
Do you have friends in the industry?
Vidya Balan is lovely and is a friend who understands me. There is a bond I feel with Naseer bhai(Naseeruddin Shah) and I like him a lot. I know that he cares for me apart from the fact that he feels there are only two good actors in the industry — Irrfan and me.
Who do you credit your success in the film industry to?
Jayaji, Joy Augustine and Raju Hirani. Jayaji was the first person to see through me and tell me that I use my comedy to hide my sensitivity. She also told me, 'You are like Al Pacino in this industry'. Someday, I will do Scarface and dedicate it to her